$100000 goal for 2011

Hello

Well as the title says i am going for this goal by the end of the coming year. I have not thought about the reality of such a goal, about what i would have to make in a week or month or whatever. I am just a man with a dream and a decent approach to the game every time i play and if i bog myself down with too many immediate goals in what i should make in a week or a day i would find myself putting myself under undue pressure.

I will tell you what though i will be finally documenting my ingoings and outgoings financially for the sole purpose of seeing if i do make that much this year, the fact that i am still this lazy on that front is frightening. I think with more control with organising my finances and actually seeing how everything is going i can push on with poker with more dominance knowing how much of a gift i do have with such a money making machine and not holding too many moments pondering on anything else other than pwning hardcore, not letting any doubts set in that will always have a negative affect.

I have noticed that variance isn't what has made my income in this game a little varied (i play enough hours and tables to iron this out) it is more my own confidence and somewhat susceptibility to irritability lol. What a phrase. If i combat my own demons of restlessness over such long periods of time playing by being very disciplined and stop the mantra of WHY ME? Why am i getting so unlucky, why am i feeling so stressed about playing today? Should i be playing today? All i seem to be doing here is losing (as i go all in with 72 on an unnecessary bluff). I think that i will be a fucking machine of making money and will be making it look easy.

I am not letting myself easily make money because i never make anything easy for myself so how can i expect to? Hmmmm. This is more a personal trait i have to get to grips with and i am happy to be sharing this mental breakdown with you lol.

For me to have no excuses and i can swear to you that is all i have come up with at any given point, i need to list all of the things that i think will make me ready to win at poker and then go about in winning without unnecessary overthinking.

This includes trying out holdem manager for a change. Will the insight of knowing a players history really affect my play against them or will the added screen presence of these irritating boxes prove much more detrimental in tilting me? That is a question that can be solved through actually bothering to set this all up and to stop worrying about it. Another question is if i went to the gym today will i be buzzing and more up for this grind? Yes it would. So instead of playing while thinking fuck i should have went to the gym, i go to the gym. There are other things that need to be noted as well but i notice i just need to get on with doing things rather than not and then obsessing about them.

As you may see i over analyse things until they are crushed. This is a great thing if you can hone in on this but a nightmare if you let your mind run riot.

So i have my end goal in $100,000 for the year set up. I have my finacial records ready to find out if i am going to be making that, and i have a daily routine for when i do put in a tournament shift. I am going to abide by all of them religiously so i can be content with the preparation before i start each session.

I am sorry about the length of this post, i felt i needed to get this out of the way before all of the next posts that will hopefully show you my uprise in fortunes. I have over a $20K br to play poker with at the moment and have shown a poker record in the past weeks that has made me think i can really get down to some serious business for this new year, but i have had some blemishes in the last two days of tilting that just need to be eradicated now so i can become a machine and can think about how to invest all of the money i am making without any tilting urges ever coming across me again. If i do feel like i may tilt on a certain day after i have gone to the gym, have eaten healthily and done everything right i will listen to my body and just avoid poker.

Going to see what its like to be properly prepared everytime i play poker, i think the confidence will result in unbelievable plays and even better wins, but we'll see.

I wish you all a good xmas and if i don't post again before the year is up a happy new year.

Ant.

Accidental Binkage

Hey

I wasn't feeling too good today. That is why i unregistered from my normal grind for damage limitation. Started at 5 and cancelled regging for all tourns up until 6 knowing i was tilting all over the place. I duly went out of every tourney but had accidentally remained in a 7 o clock 109f 18k gtd.

Was gutted when it popped up as i wanted an early kip and a film or summin. But it turns out i go on to win it for $4.7k. I was down $1.6k the last night i played but now this has me up nicely for the last two days. Long may this run continue.

Ant

In top form

Hello

Have only put in four nights of poker mtt grinding since the 16th of october as i am at university and taking it pretty seriously. But i have won over £3000. This has made me think that i shouldn't really do anything else other than work towards uni and play poker, and i am very much looking into the philosophy of one day on and one day off to keep things fresh.

So yeh. I may be a serious baller if things continue but i doubt they will something will have to go wrong. What i have noticed is that i have reduced the amount of tables i am grinding to around 9 and this has helped me concetrate more and made me get better results.

Also i have noticed i have no real fear near the end of the tournaments and am getting good at seeing them off. Tonight in particular was a sign of my ruthlessness. I was in the last 4 in a $5k GTD tourney with $1350 for 1st and $350 for 4th and i was joint chip lead, and then two other medium stacks. The other three guys all called for a deal. I remained quiet revalling in the fact i was against scared players and i was abusing them with a sense of sadism. Eventually i had an insurmountable chip lead and took down the tournament despite cries, as each player bit to dust, to have an updated deal proposal. NO! I'm gonna take this down instead brooo.

Going to Sheffield for the weekend today to watch Crystal Palace FC playing tomorrow. Also my mates 21st so it should be a great weekend.

Will let you go anyway. Just to say i expect my downfall to come soon, but while it doesn't i will continue to fill my boots. Take it easy.

Ant

On the Uni Grind

Hey

I have a lot of work to do for uni and will be doing that now. I am going to be concentrating on this mainly and play poker whenever i have time. Doing this just so i can live with myself next october when we all graduate and i can be truly happy with the grade i get. If i don't get a 2:1 then i will be content that i did all i could, and whatever grade i got is what i deserved. However, i am a relative perfectionist and if i don't get a 2:1 I will be dissappointed, so i need to assure now that thats not going to happen. So while i have loads of time before all of the deadlines I am going to prepare the work properly for the deadlines set and then see where i can fit poker in.


As i find if i have any nagging thoughts while i try to play i lose loads. When i am content and eager, with no other worries, i often have eye of the tiger like concentration levels and make a serious killing. Like the run i had recently of having £500 nights was made because i was playing with a inpenetratable swagger on the tables. I just followed my instincts and wammo i was pulling off some great calls, some great bluffs and it was like i was in a boxing match bobbing and weaving with superior confidence.

However if i have anything else on my mind at all that day that will annoy me, it all goes to pieces and i needn't have started. So the lesson here is to only play when i feel comfortable doing so. I have been talking a while about preparation for poker and along with the general knowhow of the game (mathematics and stuff like that) you are nothing without your temperament. I am noticing now how strict and disciplined i need to be to play poker for a living after uni and i won't play another hand until all other things in my life (uni mainly) are in place, so then this will allow me to enjoy my poker, the success that it brings and play with a long lasting confidence. Which in the past i just haven't had.

This may sound negative but my bankroll is healthy and i am keen to get back into the game as soon as possible, but i just won't rush myself. Uni is first as it is the backup to the "real world" so it will ease the pressure on me having to sustain only poker for the forseeable future. I will also be looking into getting a part time job to help the CV tick along.

So thats it for the meanwhile i hope to come back to you with news of a big win and eventually next year with my uni success, because if i am being honest the latter means so much more to me.

Ant

oh no beaten by sweets!

Hey

I spent sunday night going for a relative gamble. I had a massive uprise in profts previously which had my roll at about $19K so i thought i could lay about $1k on the line and just go for it!

Didn't go to plan but i really was on track! I had started at about 8.30pm and was looking to play until about 4am. I started in dominating fashion getting big stacks early and playing aggressively whenever i could. Raising most pots in position and eventually taking it down either pre flop, post flop on turn or on the river with complete bluffs always knowing when to stop when there was no chance of winning the hand. You could say i was in the zone.

And what a time to be in the zone i was doing great when i was playing tourns i am not bankrolled for. A result right? Well yeh i assume it would have been if not for my complete indiscipline on the eating front! I will explain now.

I had eaten a glorious roast dinner cooked by mum at about 6.30pm, twas lovely, then i decided i wouldn't prepare any food for the rest of the night. By 12.30am i was starving but still doing great in these tournaments. And i saw these packets of sweets i had not opened. These 39p midget gums. I opened them and let loose, eating the whole packet very quickly. There was another packet and i did the same.

2 mins later and i am off my face on some sort of Sugar Rush! It lasted about 45 mins and had me go out of nearly half my tournaments. I couldn't concentrate, felt ill and it was just the worst timing! In the tourns i had left i was just too tilted to play properly even when i had decided to go get a sandwich quickly from the kitchen. It was tough knowing how much money i had squandered and i was too disgusted at myself to see the remainder of the tourns through properly. Opting instead to just play hastily and load up some more episodes of The Wire.

Also i decided to tell everyone on msn what had happened and every which one of the replies i got from people were of shock one even pronouncing he was "scared" of my convo antics. As i was talking so fast in a crazy rage i didn't let anyone get a response in, plus i was talking complete nonsense. But when you do say that you have taken some "sweets" and it made you go on a trip i doubt they are going to think of the situation as innocent!

O well. I lost $700 for the night as i had binked a third in a small 100 person sit and go to recoup some losses, so i think i got away with it a little bit on sunday. I then proceeded not to play poker until i felt fresh about going back on. I have noticed, with me anyway, i normally always win, barring ridiculous bad luck, if i am mentally and physically prepared for a 12 hour grind. When i am not i often tilt and lose money. I still havent, after 3 years, got the perfect discipline for this game. However getting that may be impossible. Day in and day out to do the same routine to enable perfect concentration levels, meh, it just wont happen!

I guess it will be about damage limitation whenever i have a grind started and feel off by unregistering for tournaments where i can and stopping early. But if i want to be a true soldier of the game i need to give myself the best chance of playing 12 hour days for as many days as possible. So gym, healthy eating, having food prepared during the grind at close proximity to the computer to make it so i don't have to sit out of all the tourns as i rush to the kitchen, a lot of drink at the ready, and a good music playlist lined up. If i get the perfect formula i should be able to rake in loads of money as my game is pretty tight now.

I had the right idea for the last week when i made the £4000 by playing superb stuff on a consistent basis, but sunday just showed that one hiccup in preparation and you can be sent flying into a world of pain and a spot where losing money will just happen!

Wow this has been a long post but i just felt i would let some frustration get out! I don't know if i will be playing again this week as i am going to the Isle of Wight on friday and Malta next wednesday. But rest assured i will only play when i feel right in doing so, and with poker i think that is already half the battle won!

Good luck peeps

£4000 in 7 days, could get used to this.

Hello there

I have been rampant recently on the mtts across a lot of sites. Mainly focussing on the tourns that have less runners to start maybe 500 or less and i then commence in 12-16 tabling them for about 12 hours a pop. I try to keep it to 12 tables but if i am running well in more tourns than anticipated i can just about manage to take on board 4 more without completely oblitorating my chances in all

It is the regularity of the profits that is so nice to see, its nearly as if i can say before i start playing that i will be making £300 or more today. I play lots of tournaments on a nightly basis, probably in the region of 40, and normally get some good luck in at least one to secure a profit for the night. It keeps me at ease if i am running bad at any one time because i know i am likely to bink something or another. Just ridculously, supremely confident about my game.

Recently i have been making about £500 a day but for only the last 7 days so can't say that is my regular wage. Probably should be looking at £300 for every 12 hours played which is a great hourly rate and if i can maintain that then happy days.

Be interesting to see what i do when uni starts later this month. I am going to get a feel for the written work i have to do and see what best suits me. How am i going to incorporate poker and uni? I guess i will have to see. Whatever i do i will be going for a 2:1 and to maintain a steady wage throughout my studies.

Also i feel like if i am going to be hard at poker and writing i might as well try for more poker holidays! These would be a great escape from everything and i know my uni isn't the best in keeping records of attendances or being too bothered about it all so hopefully if i just get my work handed in on the deadlines to a good standard then perhaps i needn't bother with the lectures and instead strive for one 4 day abroad holiday a month haha. I could try and make this year the most hectic and enjoyable of my life and if i somehow get poker, work and 5 holidays in with a nice steady profit then that is lovely.

I am in a weird place right now as i, for the first time, have no doubts in my game, the money keeps pouring in on a daily basis and i am seemingly utterly unphased by it all. Which i think is key because i can deal with final tables better where i am not too concerned about money jumps as long as i make the right move and i know that being aggressive is always a plus.

So there you have it i am doing great and i really think this will continue at the same steady rate for months to come. However i would be lying if i didn't think its gonna go wrong somehwere!

Loving it

Hey

Finally got a sort of grind pinned down for myself. Have been playing most nights for the past two weeks with great success. On about £300 a night avg with winnings happening pretty consistently each day close to that number, just in case you thought i have had 13 losing days and then one huge bink.

I just know i have got to carry on with what i am doing and see what it will be like when i finally allow myself to play 22 dolla rebuys and 109f's, i wonder if my winning rate will go up. Not sure as of yet but i think it would.

Sorry for the short and pretty uninteresting post, i haven't had much go on recently and not really been in the mood to blog but i am desperately looking forward to Malta in 2 weeks time. Got a 1100 euros entry in the Malta Madness main event which i assume will have around 100 runners so its about 20K for the win. That would be nice!

Also had £120 on France to be Bosnia & Herzegovina at 6/4 whcih came in so things are on the rise for me atm. Just need to keep on winning

Ant